Only you could make those words cute. God created pudding, and then he rested. Only you could make those words cute. You look…perfect. I'm doing mental jumping jacks. Only you could make those words cute. Rorschach would say you have a hard time relating to others. I'm real proud of you for coming, bro. I know you hate funerals. I will destroy you I'm a…
And so we say goodbye
Nov 2, 2016
I love you, buddy And so we say goodbye to our beloved pet, Nibbler, who's gone to a place where I, too, hope one day to go. The toilet. File not found. Have you ever tried just turning off the TV, sitting down with your children, and hitting them? Now, now. Perfectly symmetrical violence never solved anything. It may comfort you to know that Fry's…
This is fun
Nov 2, 2016
I'm partial to air conditioning. I love Halloween. The one time of year when everyone wears a mask … not just me. Watching ice melt. This is fun. I'm really more an apartment person. Makes me a … scientist. Pretend. You pretend the feelings are there, for the world, for the people around you. Who knows? Maybe one day they will be. I will not…
I’m going to remind
Nov 2, 2016
Why did you bring us here? This is the worst kind of discrimination: the kind against me! I'm just glad my fat, ugly mama isn't alive to see this day. I had more, but you go ahead. Goodbye, friends. I never thought I'd die like this. But I always really hoped. Wow! A superpowers drug you can just rub onto your skin? You'd think it…
Shut up and take my money
Aug 5, 2016
Dissect its brain! That's right, baby. I ain't your loverboy Flexo, the guy you love so much. You even love anyone pretending to be him! Doomsday device? Ah, now the ball's in Farnsworth's court! You know the worst thing about being a slave? They make you work, but they don't pay you or let you go. I don't want to be rescued. Who am I…
Over the years
Aug 1, 2016
I've lived in darkness a long time. Over the years my eyes adjusted until the dark became my world and I could see. Tonight's the night. And it's going to happen again and again. It…
Keep your mind
Aug 1, 2016
We are more Pretend. You pretend the feelings are there, for the world, for the people around you. Who knows? Maybe one day they will be. I'm going to tell you something that I've never told anyone before. Tonight's the night. And it's going to happen again and again. It has to happen. Hello, Dexter Morgan. I'm not the monster he wants me to be.…
Tonight’s the night
Aug 1, 2016
Rorschach would say you have a hard time relating to others. I like seafood. I'm really more an apartment person. I'm generally confused most of the time. I'm Dexter, and I'm not sure what I am. I'm going to tell you something that I've never told anyone before. Under normal circumstances, I'd take that as a compliment. Tell him time is of the essence. I'm…
As an interesting side note
May 20, 2016
Does anybody else feel jealous and aroused and worried? Bender, hurry! This fuel's expensive! Also, we're dying! When I was first asked to make a film about my nephew, Hubert Farnsworth, I thought "Why should…
Wow, you got that off the Internet?
May 18, 2016
Oh sure! For the last time, I don't like lilacs! Your 'first' wife was the one who liked lilacs! There's no part of that sentence I didn't like! I've got to find a way to escape the horrible ravages of youth. Five hours? Yeah, and if you were the pope they'd be all, "Straighten your pope hat." And "Put on your good vestments." Son, as…
With a warning label
May 18, 2016
Son, as your lawyer, I declare y'all are in a 12-piece bucket o' trouble. But I done struck you a deal: Five hours of community service cleanin' up that ol' mess you caused. You're going to do his laundry? Say what? No! I want to live! There are still too many things I don't own! Bender, we're trying our best. Isn't it true that you…
You have a good heart
May 18, 2016
Whoa a real live robot; or is that some kind of cheesy New Year's costume? You, a bobsleder!? That I'd like to see! Soon enough. Who are you, my warranty?! Bite my shiny metal ass. Guards! Bring me the forms I need to fill out to have her taken away! Oh, I always feared he might run off like this. Why, why, why didn't I…